[He closes his eyes, even if Kravitz can't see, when he kisses his head, taking a breath and knowing he just needs to calm down. Needs to do... something, because he needs to talk to someone about this but he can't talk to Kravitz but he should? He's offering? He should take advantage of that, like cashing in a favor, and--
The thing Taako will be most embarrassed about, when he has time to think about it, is the way that Kravitz undoubtedly felt the way his heart beat faster when he hears the word love.
The second will be, of course, that his first thought is he could make it straight out the window, featherfall to the floor, and just start running as a completely viable option.
He doesn't do that, thankfully, because explaining it later would've been an utter disaster, but he does tense, feeling like his head is spinning and he just utterly doesn't know what to say. Does Kravitz expect him to say it back? Is he waiting for him to-- to bare everything out like that? It took so much to say that to even Lup, to think there was even anyone past that, how long it took to think of anyone else as family, it's...
This is too much. It's finally, finally too much. The panic, the uncertainty, the outright hurt, and it bubbles over and out of his eyes. He hates this. He hates being like this.
He hates that the whole time, he's still clinging to Kravitz like a lifeline.]
You don't have to.
[That... made no sense, he's realizing, even if it's the most genuine response Kravitz has probably ever heard out of him.]
I mean you don't, uh, have to be all mushy and shit, it's just... this place sure likes to bring in people I don't wanna fuckin' see before they even did the shit I care about. So there's not... can't really talk about it.
[He squeezes his eyes again, not looking at him, just trying to stop fucking crying. Taako heaves a breath from his chest, reaches up to quickly push away the tears, and finally looks up, letting go just enough, but not actually pushing Kravitz away.]
It just sucks. This place just, messing around. All of it sucks.
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The thing Taako will be most embarrassed about, when he has time to think about it, is the way that Kravitz undoubtedly felt the way his heart beat faster when he hears the word love.
The second will be, of course, that his first thought is he could make it straight out the window, featherfall to the floor, and just start running as a completely viable option.
He doesn't do that, thankfully, because explaining it later would've been an utter disaster, but he does tense, feeling like his head is spinning and he just utterly doesn't know what to say. Does Kravitz expect him to say it back? Is he waiting for him to-- to bare everything out like that? It took so much to say that to even Lup, to think there was even anyone past that, how long it took to think of anyone else as family, it's...
This is too much. It's finally, finally too much. The panic, the uncertainty, the outright hurt, and it bubbles over and out of his eyes. He hates this. He hates being like this.
He hates that the whole time, he's still clinging to Kravitz like a lifeline.]
You don't have to.
[That... made no sense, he's realizing, even if it's the most genuine response Kravitz has probably ever heard out of him.]
I mean you don't, uh, have to be all mushy and shit, it's just... this place sure likes to bring in people I don't wanna fuckin' see before they even did the shit I care about. So there's not... can't really talk about it.
[He squeezes his eyes again, not looking at him, just trying to stop fucking crying. Taako heaves a breath from his chest, reaches up to quickly push away the tears, and finally looks up, letting go just enough, but not actually pushing Kravitz away.]
It just sucks. This place just, messing around. All of it sucks.